I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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