is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize