an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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