good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
