i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
