I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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