just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
