I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
