Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
