Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
