Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
