how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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