I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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