We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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