Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
