I showed him my bush... on skype.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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