i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
