You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
