I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize