Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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