It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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