bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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