STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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