Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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