i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize
