So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
i believe in u and ur pee
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
