i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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