She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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