Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Randomize
