I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
