PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
