Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize