She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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