apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
