day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
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