so explain again why im purple
no
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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