Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
home. puking in laundry basket.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize