I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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