I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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