Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
