If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
ttyl tear gas
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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