i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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