is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
