if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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