If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
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