just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
