So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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