just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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