question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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