with your own penis?
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
