you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You're like the curious george of whores
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize