You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
